20th Anniversary of Failure’s “Fantastic Planet”

One of the most amazing, yet criminally underrated rock albums of all time was released 20 years ago today. ❤ Happy 20th anniversary of Failure releasing the masterpiece that is Fantastic Planet. This incredible album was released this day in 1996 with little to no support from their record label. the album never charted, however has attained a large cult following bringing them back together as of 2013.

Failure, definitely one of the most left of center bands that emerged from the “grunge” scene, set themselves apart for their creative use of space, melody, chord progressions, signal processing, emphasis on massive bass guitar tones, angsty, yet calm vocal delivery, and playing all the wrong notes at all the right times. Fantastic Planet was where failure morphed these to create their magnum opus.

Fantastic planet was recorded mainly in the bedroom and bathroom(?) of a house the band rented from Lita Ford, amidst the chaos of their record label defaulting. Therefore the band received little assistance in making the album, as well as each band members personal (drug related) issues. These problems are all reflected in the music.

The band therefore had full musical and production related control over the album, and therefore were not bound by any standards. Each song has art rock inspired, subtle nuances, from breakdown sections of acoustic guitars, masses of cymbal wash, amongst the excellently produced lo-fi environment. Distorted keyboards, cello, and some sort of odd jack in the box (i think its a celesta?) intro and theme that appears throughout the album add a certain sense of foreboding. Each song leads into the next fluidly, assisted by the albums numerous segues (theres three of them) that help piece the album together. These segues are ambient, ambient instrumental sections and collections of various sound effects.

What Failure managed to make, was a piece of rock music and art, that is indescribably unique, managing to bring a pastiche of space rock, metal, new wave, art rock, post progressive and classical music and applying it within the confines of 90’s alt rock, in a way no band before has or ever will for that matter.

If you’ve read this far, please stop and listen to the album.Thanks to Greg Edwards, Ken Andrews and Kelli Scott for changing my perspective of music forever. Its that album I wish i could have written myself but never could, and direct the music I write on its basis.

Movies… Why???

What ever happened to thought provoking movies that have good story lines and an actual point?

I am an old-school movie nut, and i can’t understand what appeals viewers of modern action movies in the 21st century. Movies these days seem to be all about special effects, movies full of explosions and cool machines killing people, with a happy ending where the protagonist kills all the bad guys and gets the girl in the end. 

What ever happened to story lines, well developed characters and character relationships. Movies that have events that are remotely possible, that provoke thought and challenge the viewer emotionally to fall in love with the characters. Instead the modern audience is fixated upon special effects, car chases and very simple story lines.

Another thing I cannot understand is superhero movies. They receive such amazing critical acclaim and yet all have the same basic story line, and as usual end with the protagonist defeating the bad guys and saving the world and all that sappy crap.

Don’t get me wrong, I love movies full of guns, violence and car chases, but there has to be a point, a greater message, and an ending that moves the viewer. Sadly, nearly all modern movies lack the ability to do this. This is due to the depressing fact that the movie industry is now for the witless and the absent minded.

 

Being A Metalhead Doesn’t Make You a Satanist!!

Whilst on the topic of heavy metal, I figured I would destroy another unrealistic stereotype of heavy metal fans being Satanists. What a load of crap

For years groups such as the Parents Music Recourse Centre and the bastards at the Westboro Baptist Church have attempted to deem heavy metal an unchristian style of music. Sure there are extreme bands such slayer, and those in the the Norwegian Black Metal scene that directly attack religion. But these are extremes.

Metal bands are mistaken as satanic by their evil sound and occult themed vocals about Satan. But does this mean its promoting Satan? No. When you consider this, metal can actually be considered a product promoting fear in Satan, therefore emphasising the Christian belief that Satan is evil.

One example of this comes from my Favorite band Black Sabbath. Credited by most as the first proper heavy metal band, they wore crosses and used occult themed artwork on their albums. But the crosses were originally given to them as a gift for protection. Due to their christian faith, they still wear crosses today. So to all of those overly religious people who are blinded by their faith in god, open your own eyes and see that metal is about as evil and satanic as the pop music you promote on radio every day.

No, Metal is not “screamo”!!

Metal is not “screamo”. Metal is an incredibly diverse, musically compelling and complicated genre of music. There are over 1000 different sub genres of heavy metal, differing in areas from lyrical content, to the speed, dynamics, guitar tuning, time signatures and many other important elements of music.

So us metalheads get annoyed, when you swagfags dismiss the music we love, and when we are alienated for listening to a more alternative and now frowned upon genre of music. But before I go into heavy metal, lets have a look at modern pop and electronic music. This music is generally made in a 4/4 time signature, using computers to make the rhythm and melody, requiring minimal talent apart from computer knowledge. The vocals are made with extremely simplistic melodies, and auto tuned vocals, which can make any singer sound decent. The lyrical content is poor and repetitive, and has no suggested meaning other than what is directly said. If there are instrumental parts, basic chord progressions and simple major/minor keys are used. Heavy metal on the other hand, is played in a range of often sonically challenging time signatures, using REAL instruments that require years of practice to play well, and many more years to perfect. The vocals are made with a wide array of melodies from different scales and modes, and when recorded are only edited with simple effects such as reverb, therefore no autotune is used, so singers have to have some amount of vocal ability. The lyrical content is based on a wide array of topics depending on the genre and the ability of the band members who write the songs themselves, unlike pop singers who each have multiple song writers. The lyrics also have another meaning than what is implied in the song, so lyrics are written metaphorically. Metal vocals are not all screamed, most metal is sung, and only the extreme genres involve screaming, (remember there are over 1000 genres of metal) and studies have proven that the screaming in metal music is harder to master than the singing in pop music. Guitar, bass and drums and keyboard are the general instruments used in metal, and their parts are fast, very complex and sonically challenging.

Another major issue is the connection between metal and “emos”. Metalheads are not “emos”. Yes we wear similar black clothes, but that doesnt make us “emo”. And no, the music is not about cutting yourself and killing people. Metal music is uplifting, and has saved many people from suicide and other problems due to them listening to metal. Also, we aren’t all satanists. Yes, most of us are atheist, and a lot of metal is sung against God, but that doesn’t mean the artists are satanic, but trying to fit a certain image. For example Slayer, the first metal band to directly attack the christian faith is fronted by Tom Araya, who is a devoted catholic, yet he sings songs such as “God Hates Us All”.

But the most annoying thing of all, is the word “screamo”. There is no such thing as “screamo”! It’s called metal, death metal, or whatever you want to call it, but there isn’t to my knowledge any real genre of music called “screamo”. So the next time your friend says he listens to metal, don’t criticize him, because his taste in music is a hell of a lot more interesting than yours. And by the way, never call metal “screamo” again!

Bloody Lads

LADS are the sorriest excuse for stupid, uneducated, illiterate Australian scummy children and it would please me if they all suffer severe injuries to their genitalia. For those of you who don’t know what a Lad is, to my understanding they are kids who hang out on public transport and shopping centers in gangs looking for trouble. They are easily identifiable by their Nike snap backs, and sporting brand apparel.

Anyway, I was on a tram on the way to a nursing home as part of my schools community action program. My friend and I sat quietly on the tram minding our own business, when a bunch of lads approached us. Decked out in Adidas clothing, they sat in the seats to our right, and one of them recognized our school uniform.”ay mate, you go to dat’ poofta’ school. Who gives and who takes it”. The dickheads burst into a bout of laughter, as did I, laughing at the stupidity of his diction. Another illiterate lad decided to join in. “Yeh’ mate, I versed ya’ in footy, I’s too scared to bend over cos’ I thought I’d get bummed mate”. Out of his sheer stupidity, one of the lads turned to his friend and asked, “so who gets it?”. In an even stupider reply, his friend answered, “I dunno. they wouldn’t say”. But before I had a chance to reply, one screamed “Oh my God, look at dat guy’s Adidas”. Their attention turned to another passenger at the other side of the tram, and walked over to that person, only it wasn’t a walk. Every four steps, they did a skip, as if they were too cool and had way too much sw@g to walk like a normal person.

They left the tram, and I sat, unable to contain my laughter. I’m no professor, but thank fuck I’m not that dumb.

8 Reasons Why Guitars and Basses are Better Than Women

*disclaimer* This is not a serious post. This is solely stereotypical.If you find any of this offensive, please comment and I will remove it.

1. You don’t have to pay attention to a guitars feelings
2. Guitars don’t tell all the other guitars your problems
3. Guitars play only the music you like
4. Guitars only want one thing
5. You can leave your bass and a guitar in a room together, nothing will happen between them
6. Guitars don’t get mad at you if you play another guitar
7. Guitars don’t ask if their bum looks fat every time someone looks at them
8. It’s cool to drop the bass. If you drop a woman, they cry